Mama, Mama I'm coming hooooome...

When I can't find the words to express my feelings or circumstances, I often turn to the great Ozzy Osbourne for inspiration. Once again, he has come through for me:

"Times have changed and times are strange
Here I come, but I ain't the same
Mama, I'm coming home"

On July 2nd, I'll be returning to the United States as originally planned. However, I'll be staying there...which definitely wasn't part of the original plan. Due to some unforeseen Visa issues, I'm being "politely" asked to leave the country and am not allowed to return to Europe for 90 days. The plan is to leave before I get the official deportation order - sort of like quitting a job right before you know you are about to get fired. Sneaky.

After two weeks of crying and trying to find a way around my imminent deportation, I've accepted that my time in Prague is being cut short and am focusing on the positives. I really wanted to get two things out of this adventure: 1) Get back to being the "old Emily" who was happy and jolly and excited 2) Figure out what I want to do with the rest (or at least next stage) of my life. Honestly, I feel like I've done a pretty good job accomplishing those two things. My time in Prague has no doubt been challenging but I've learned to function (quite well if I do say so myself) in a foreign country, discovered a talent for charades (for those times when my mastery of 7 Czech words just isn't enough), conquered my fear of Tesco, snapped out of my "I don't have the energy or desire to date" funk and, most importantly, developed a love of teaching. I really do love my job and will miss my students so much! I'm hoping to continue teaching when I return to the States. Fingers crossed...or thumbs held as my Czech friends say.

So...one month left in this amazing city! I will definitely miss it. My job, my students, my friends, the pivo, a certain manfriend that I enjoy spending time with, the ease of public transportation - I could go on and on...but now a new adventure awaits! Things happen for a reason, right?

Here's me at the American Embassy preparing to beg them for help. Their idea of "help" was telling me to get the hell out of the Czech Republic as soon as possible.

Rhymes with Dirty Nun

Tomorrow I will be SOLIDLY in my thirties. The past year has just been a test run...tomorrow is the beginning of the real deal. 31. When I turned 30, nearly everyone who had already reached that milestone said "Oh my thirties have been the best years of my life so far!" or something to that effect. Ok life...I'm ready! 30 was a roller coaster year. I like to think that 31 will be a bit less bumpy but I'm not so sure my current lifestyle lends itself to stability. We'll see how it goes!

Last night, I celebrated with sushi and bowling! A few weeks ago, one of my friends from home said "Do your Prague friends understand how important your birthday is?"...she knows me pretty well. :) Good news - we had an amazing time and they didn't disappoint! (well there was one person who did but it didn't come as a surprise) There were flowers, traditional Russian toasts, singing, dancing...and now my apartment smells suspiciously like cake so I have a feeling that the celebration isn't over! Woo! Mama and Daddy are coming to Prague on Thursday for a birthday visit and I am REALLY excited about it! Happy Birthday to me!


The waiter gave me a beer, a rose and a stick of gum in honor of my big day.


Serious bowlers.


Serious sushi.

Presidents, Giraffes, Communism and Men with Jacked Up Teeth

Easter Monday is a national holiday in the Czech Republic...a country that is 75% athiest. I don't get it but I'll accept it. I needed a long weekend! Been a bit down in the dumps here lately for no good reason. Perhaps the newness of living in a foreign country has worn off and now instead of being excited by all the little differences, I find myself becoming a bit annoyed. And there is the fact that my lifestyle is pretty much completely different than it was 4 months ago. Three roommates, eratic work schedule, no Chick Fil-A, no option of picking up the phone and talking to my best friends every day and very little money. But hey, this is what I signed up for! I'm sure I'll snap out of it soon and be back on Team Prague in no time. The lovely Spring weather is definitely a mood booster and Pam and Marshall will be here in a few weeks for a birthday visit....woohoo!

Here are some pics of what I've been up to lately - Weekend in Berlin (yes, that's me climbing over the Berlin Wall. classic.), Obama in Prague, Czech National Hockey Playoffs (Go Slavia!) and the Prague Zoo. I've tried for 20 minutes to get these pictures in nice, orderly rows but it isn't working! ahhhhhhhhhh...

Another First!

I just experienced another "first"...snow in my bed! I've been sick for the past couple of days so I opened my bedroom windows to let some fresh air in. Fresh air kills germs, right? Next best thing to Lysol! "It's nice and sunny - almost a spring-like day," I thought. About 30 minutes later, I was in the living room trying to function like a normal, healthy human being (sitting on the couch rather than lying in the bed) when I glanced out the window and saw a blizzard! I came back in my room to discover snow on my bed!!

It's pretty and all but did the weatherman in Prague not get the message about SPRING?

No Shirt, No Shoes? Come Right On In!

Last week was all about boobs. Yes, I said it...boobs.

It all started on Wednesday afternoon. There I sat with my two students, both girls about my age, working on a vocabulary lesson. Sort of a "find the one that doesn't belong activity". We got through the whole exercise with no problems and then came to #10. The words were 'gaffe' 'faux pas' 'boob' and some other word that had nothing to do with the first three. The only word they knew was "faux pas" so I had to explain the other two to them. Gaffe -a mistake, blunder, blah blah blah. And then on to boob. Boob? I've never used the word "boob" in my life to refer to anything other than, well, a boob. So I struggled through the PC definition and then said "Ok look - so the most common use of that word in American English is to talk about these" and pointed to mine. They laughed and laughed. It was only fitting since in the previous lesson I had to point out a difference in British and American English when Marta said "Hold on - I'll go to my office and get a rubber" and then returned with an eraser.

So then on to Thursday. It was a very long day. I usually only have two classes on Thursday but had picked up a few substitions for extra money. I had plans to meet Anya, one of my flatmates, for a drink at our neighborhood Irish pub on my way home from class at about 8pm. Now this is the SAME pub we went to last Thursday night so I expected that it would have the same basic atmosphere as last time. How silly of me! I got there first, sat down and began looking over the menu...not noticing anything out of the ordinary. The waitress came over and asked for my drink order in Czech and, as I looked up to give it to her, I came face to...er...nipple with her bare chest! She was topless!?!!? All of the other waitresses were wearing shirts. Did she just forget? Was it laundry day? Now she did have a piece of fabric across her back with two sleeves attached. Not showing her arms...so modest of her. Despite the somewhat shady atmosphere, the spaghetti was excellent!

It has to be over, right? Oh no. Friday. More boob. I had about 30 minutes to kill before class so I went for a walk and came across Kavarna Cirkus (Circus Cafe). PERFECT! A nice relaxing spot where I can have a cup of tea and make my grocery list. I noticed an odd ramp at the entrance but didn't really think much of it...I just thought ramps at cafe entrances would be the next addition to the long list of things I don't understand in this country. I walked up the ramp, opened the door and BAM...you guessed it - boobs. Evidently, Kavarna Cirkus is a coffeeshop for women to come breastfeed their babies while their other children run wild. The ramp was for strollers...makes total sense now! I wasn't going to let a few snacking babies stop me - I sat down in the corner and enjoyed my tea, all the while deflecting curious, somewhat annoyed stares from the La Leche League. Single, childless women need tea too, dammit!

And Saturday I went to a strip club.



kidding.

Dreary (but fun!) Dresden

Since we've all spent most of the last two months within the city limits of Prague, some of my fellow teachers and I decided to bust out this weekend and go explore a new city and, for Anya and I, a new country. We took an early train to Dresden, Germany on Saturday morning and returned late Saturday night. Despite the unbelievably cold/rainy/windy/dreary weather, we took in the sites and enjoyed an amazing traditional German meal! Here are some pictures from the day -

I Apologize You

I'm back...

I've had a lot going on lately and not a whole lot of energy/motivation/brainpower for blogging. My sweet PaPaw passed away on Feb. 15th so I made an unexpected trip home to be with my family. I missed my first week of teaching but, after two deaths in one month, home was EXACTLY where I needed to be! It was great to have our whole family together (cousins and all) despite the reason. My grandmother was blessed with total lucidity for the few days surrounding the funeral so she was able to tell stories about Papaw that I'd never heard before, which was very sweet. As much as I loved being there, I really hope I don't have to make any other unexpected trips home while I'm living abroad. Rough year so far for the Ledbetter clan!

I returned to Prague on Sunday, Feb 22nd and started teaching at 7:30am on Monday morning. Nothing like a little jet lag on your first day of work to make you forget how nervous you are! So far, so good! Despite the early mornings, I look forward to my classes - my students are interesting, they want to learn and are they also really appreciative. And they like me...they really like me! (Isn't that what life is all about anyway?) They say funny things like "Eh...that's not really my cup of coffee," (rather than tea) and "I apologize you. I need go peepee" and "Thank you (elevator door closes, reopens). Bye bye (elevator door closes, reopens again). Have a nice day." I love that I am helping these people! While my previous job provided for a much higher standard of living, I never really got that warm and fuzzy "I'm really doing something great for people" feeling that I have now...it's all about the trade off. Now if I could just find someone to provide the standard of living to which I've become accustomed while I teach people the difference in pronunciation between photograph and photographer all day, I'd be set!

I'm sure I'll be singing a different, much more jaded tune at some point in the future, but for now just let me be naive and happy dammit!

Thank you. Bye Bye. Have a nice day.

Ready, Set, Teach!

First of all, that last post was a joke largely meant for Pam and Marshall. Those of you who actually believed it must seriously doubt my intelligence, common sense and, most of all, ability to learn from my mistakes! Thanks guys.

Tomorrow is my first day as a REAL teacher! I'm looking forward to it but must admit that I'm more than a tad bit nervous. These people are paying good money to learn English from a smart, professional grammarian and, instead, they are getting me! My days will now be spent navigating Prague's public transportation system, going from one company's headquarters to another, hopefully teaching a little something along the way. I was surprised to find that many of my classes will be held at companies I've actually heard of - Oracle, Boehringer Ingelheim and Honeywell to name a few. I'll be starting bright and early tomorrow morning in the cold and snow with a 7:30am class about 45 minutes away from my flat. That means I should go to bed NOW. Good night!

Not Again!!

I don’t know what it is about this town…

So there I was innocently walking down the street, doing some innocent sightseeing with my innocent friends Sam, Fabian and Kristen. And then I saw it. ABSINTHE SHOP! It was like I imprinted on it (for all you vampire nerds) and could not resist the pull. A little piece of heaven in a snowy, cold, foggy town. I ditched my friends, who are afraid of the “green fairy”, marched right in and ordered a double! Several doubles later, I staggered out of my ‘new home’ and got swept up in the throng of tourists heading for the Charles Bridge. I’m not sure what transpired at that point…I have a foggy memory of a pineapple, Band-Aids and an old lady with a pet monkey. Thank goodness, my friends found me (four short hours after they left me at the absinthe shop) sleeping like a baby on the Bridge. Why do I feel like this has happened to me before?

One Month Down...

The last four weeks have flown by! On Friday, I finished my TEFL course and, assuming I passed, will be a certified “English as a Foreign Language” teacher by the end of next week. So now it’s Sunday morning and there is really nothing I should be doing right now…I haven’t had this feeling in months! I don’t mind it one bit.

The past couple of weeks have been filled with school, school and school, a few dinner parties and one hell of a “End of TEFLing” celebration Friday night. I can’t remember the last time I saw 4:30am…ouch. Now we have the next week off (to recover from Friday!) before we begin teaching on February 16th. Thinking about heading to Budapest and Bratislava for a few days if we can find inexpensive train tickets. If I do make it to Budapest, I’ll be sure and avoid the sketchy “bathhouse” where I was assaulted by an old Hungarian lady 10 years ago. Still having nightmares about that…

I’m going to head out in a bit and go explore my new neighborhood - Vinohrady. Moving into a new flat this week!! I’m going to have a bed that is NOT a couch, a room that is NOT connected to the kitchen, a roommate who does NOT make soup at 3am every night and eat all of my food and a bedroom door that is NOT made out of glass…and we have a piano! Could life get any better?!? I’ll be living with 3 other girls from my TEFL course – Kristen, Anya and Joy. Four is definitely a crowd but the flat is huge (5 bedrooms!) and I think we’ll all get along well. We should have Wi-Fi there within the next two weeks so emailing, Skyping and blogging will be much more convenient. Though I will miss waking up to this beautiful and inspiring piece of art every morning…maybe the landlord won’t notice if I take it?

Biggest Fear

So my biggest fear about moving abroad was that someone I loved would die and I wouldn't be able to get home. Well...it happened. My uncle passed away Tuesday night. All I want to do is be at home with my family. Instead, here I sit in Prague preparing a lesson about the damn food pyramid. I'm sad and there is nothing I can do.

I Suck at Grocery Shopping!

I hate grocery shopping. I hated it in a country where I could read signs, labels, prices and packaging. I ESPECIALLY hate it in a country where I can do none of the above. I wouldn’t have gone shopping tonight had my roommate not eaten all of my food while I was in Vienna this weekend. Ah…the joys of living with other people! Why do I have such crappy luck with random roommates? Kamaran is looking pretty good these days!
Imagine going to Costco and wandering up and down every aisle, which you have to do because you have NO idea what the aisle markers say, hoping to recognize a picture on a package. Also imagine that you are vertically challenged so even if you see a picture of alphabet soup, you would need a ladder to actually reach it. Sounds fun, eh? Tonight was extra fun! As I pushed *my* cart down aisle čtyři (4) at Tesco, a lady came running up to me shouting in Czech and pointing at me. Awesome! I said, in my best Czech accent (read: horrible), "I’m sorry but I don’t speak Czech". That didn’t phase her. She kept yelling and began taking my items out of the cart and pointing at the cart and then herself. I finally realized that you have to PAY to unlock and use a cart…and evidently she’d paid for that one. Oops. Maybe she shouldn’t have left it empty and unattended!! That’s what was going through my head but the only thing coming out of my mouth was "Prosim, prosim, prosim" (sorry, sorry, sorry). Worst was over, right? Oh no – awkward misunderstandings seemed to be the theme during tonight’s grocery run. I won’t bore you with an account of each instance that I put something in my basket (the free kind that you carry, not the costly kind you push) because I thought the picture looked vaguely similar to what I wanted, and then found the actual item I was looking for seven aisles over and had to retrace my steps to find where I got the original (wrong) item. Good times. The highlight of tonight’s trip came when I arrived in the checkout line, naively assuming that I was home free! I confidently set my basket on the belt (for lack of a better word…what the hell do you call the area where you set your groceries?) behind a couple other customers, thinking that all I had to do now was hand the lady my credit card, sign my name and escape the hell that is Tesco! At that very moment, the belt (?) began moving at Mach speed, sending my basket to the front of the line, taking out every carton of eggs, bottle of milk and loaf of bread innocently standing in its path! After the little old checkout lady was done scrambling to save what she could of the other shoppers’ items, she gave me a very animated demonstration of taking the items out of the basket and placing them individually on the conveyor belt, rather than putting the full basket down on the (apparently) weight-activated belt. Who knew?

Moral of this story? I suck at grocery shopping. My request of you? Please pray that *people* (from texas) keep their grubby paws off my food so I won’t have to return to Hell anytime soon!

Pub Crawl, Pizza and Pillow Fights!

On Friday night, most of our class went out for a pub crawl. It ended at 3am with pizza and a slumber party at my flat. Good times! Why is pizza always so much better at 3am? The picture to the right is the aftermath of the slumber party. Cleaning up was a bitch but it was totally worth it! I feel more and more like actual "friends" with these people every day...and not just Facebook friends - REAL friends. It's a good feeling. Of course, I miss everyone at home but it's nice to have a little "family" here.

I'm heading to Vienna tomorrow with two classmates, Sam and Fabian. How cool is it that I can just jaunt over to Austria for the weekend?!?! Here are some pub crawl pics - Vienna pics coming soon!

The Cast of Characters

**Written on Wednesday - Posted on Friday. Tonight we're heading out for a "Yay We Finished Our First Week" Pub Crawl. I'll try to post some pics over the weekend.**

So again, sorry for the lack of postings. I still get the shakes everyday due to the lack of constant internet access. No email, no blog, no Gossip Girl…no wonder the Czech look so damn pissed off all the time! My new plan is to try and blog while I’m at home, save it to my jump drive and then post from school. Key word here is TRY.

Today marks exactly one week that I’ve been gone. It really feels so much longer than that! I’m much more comfortable with "the routine" than I thought I would be at this point. Typical day so far – wake up around 7:00am, take shower which is much more effective now that I’ve learned how to operate the hot water heater and hand held shower nozzle, and then make the 20 minute trek to school or take the 5 minute bus ride depending on timing and whether or not I can still feel my nose and ears when I get to the bus stop. 60% sensation remaining – keep walking. School starts at 9am and we have lessons on teaching theory, technique, etc. all morning and then the afternoon is filled with "Teaching Practice" which typically runs until after 5pm. Our poor students! Luckily, they knew ahead of time they would be taught by teaching students and therefore get free English lessons; even if we really blow it, they can’t demand a refund. Today was my first 45 minute lesson which was focused on reading comprehension. I definitely enjoy being in front of the class (center of attention? what?) but hope to get more comfortable with more practice. Enough about school…

Onto the Cast of Characters! Over the last two nights, I’ve really felt that many of my classmates and I have become "friends" rather than classmates. A short 10 feet from the library and computer room is the school’s pub, which is rather counterproductive but I’ve yet to hear anyone complain. Last night and tonight, we migrated there despite the insane amount of lesson planning, reading, etc. that we all have to do. I’m enjoying hearing everyone’s story – why they are here, what they plan to do next, what they did previously? And it’s amazing how much more interesting these stories get after a few pivo! Here’s a quick breakdown of my classmates, as I’m certain to reference them in future postings:
Kristen – Boston, flatmate, extremely intelligent (Princeton undergrad, Harvard graduate program) but does enjoy the nightlife…every night!
Katy – Texas, flatmate, crazy and not in a good way. She thinks everything I do is "sooooo cute!" – for instance, she came into my room a few nights ago as I was eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich (yes – I know I’m in Prague and should be eating Pork Dumplings and Cabbage but a girl needs her PB&J) and said "AWWWWWW…that is SO cute!" What? I’m eating an F-ing sandwich?
Martin – Scotland, personal trainer, no one can understand 1/2 of what he says but he’s a good sport
Barrett – Connecticut, suspect that he’s a trust fund baby, recently got his MBA and is now going to Georgetown for law school in the fall, sees this program as a way to spend his time before he starts law school
Lann – Florida, bit of a know-it-all, former EMT, former cab driver, well-traveled but close-minded
Fabian – Malaysia, has lived in England and Canada, former video game linguistics tester, very happy, enjoy him a great deal
Hunter – DC, older, served two tours in Vietnam and received an Air Force medal, most recent profession was Professional Gardener, met his partner, a native Czech guy, on the internet and moved here to live with him, also a former model…and a close talker!
Joy – California, taught English in Taiwan for a year but was not certified (the more remote the place, the less of a requirement for certification), home-schooled her whole life, has great stories, one of my favorite people
Prisco – Mexico, most recently lived in NYC, I think he has the potential to be funny but he’s very quiet and spends most of his time NOT hanging out with his classmates, writer who is traveling to find inspiration, love, happiness…at least that’s what he told me tonight?
Stuart – DC I think, uh…not my favorite
Sam – Vermont, girlfriend is teaching English in Africa, finally started feeling less homesick and began having fun with the group yesterday, shares my sarcasm which is nice
Jacob and Nora – NYC – came as a couple but have only been dating since April, she’s quiet but is beginning to come out of her shell, they are very "cool" New York…like Brooklyn, not Manhattan
Anya – Ukraine, moved to the US when she was 8 but still has an accent and certainly looks more like she fits in here than any of the rest of us, very sweet, homesick – misses her Russian boyfriend, Constantine, in Miami

Here are a couple pictures of my flat and the school:
err - scratch that. can't find them on my jump drive. will post later.

Adventures in International Travel

**I don't have internet access in my flat so I'll be posting a few days after I actually write the updates. This post is from my first night. More to come!**

Top Three Travel Highlights:

1) While waiting for my flight in Chicago, I heard “JOijooxolkj josdijh ojvoj z joij l LEDBETTER joijshoih njjjowj z joije” called out over the loud speaker. The odd part is that that is the second time in my life I’ve heard garbled foreign language, my name and then more garbled foreign language in an airport. Luckily they just needed to check my passport again to make sure I wasn’t a Russian spy and then sent me on my way.

2) As we began our approach into Warsaw, the airline captain made the following announcement: “This is your capitain. The weather in Warsaw is…good.” Awesome. Upon exiting the aircraft, I realized that me and the ol’ capitain had very different opinions of what constitutes “good” weather.

3) I look pretty threatening, right? Well the Polish Military thinks so! It must have been the bright yellow sweater and pink scarf in the sea of depressing black that clued them in to the fact that I was armed and dangerous. They pulled me to the side at the security checkpoint and demanded to search my carry-on. I forgot that I had a water bottle that was half full. OOPS. Polish Military Dude handed me the bottle and said “TRINK!” and I smiled and said, in my sweetest Southern voice, “Oh – I can just throw it away” to which he replied, “You. TRINK.” So I trinked. Trust me – you wouldn’t have argued with this guy either! I handed the bottle back to him and said “All done!”…not so much. He shook the bottle, making the five drops that were left splash together, handed it back to me and said “TRINK!”. He then proceeded to pull everything out of my carry-on, repeatedly asking “Vat iz these?”. Wow – the Polish really know how to make a girl feel welcome!

So now it’s 9:45pm on Thursday and I’m laying in my bed after 24+ hours of travel. By “bed” I mean I’m laying on the couch in the living room which is technically the third bedroom and since I got here last, I got last dibs. Winner, winner, chicken dinner! One roommate, Katy from Texas, is sleeping and the other one is MIA. Right now I’m missing my comfortable bed in my comfortable house…but tomorrow is another day!